Monday, June 22, 2009

This Would be Difficult Alone

When you are an involved parent it can be easy to take for granted the role your spouse plays. That being said, it takes only a morning like today to jerk me back to reality, and to realize that without the mother of my child around I would be spinning my wheels and getting nowhere in a hurry.

Mrs. LIAYF had to leave early this morning to catch a short flight to Portland for an important meeting, leaving me nonchalant but confident that I could get Lukas ready and out the door on time to daycare. Hey, he was already dressed and fed when she left. How hard could it be?

Cue the Benny Hill music. . . .

As I look back on the morning, I am still not sure why I couldn't quite make things fall into place. Perhaps it was the lack of a plan? At one point, I realized I was already 20 minutes late. And, Lukas pulling everything under the sun out of his toy cabinet to test their varying aerodynamic attributes from one side of the room to another. So, I handed my son his harmonica to distract him while I got everything else together.
-
This appeared to work, so I turned to open the outside kitchen sliding door to grab the one cat who hadn't yet come back inside. I leaned down to grab the cat, who mockingly darted away. #$*#@ cat! Leave it outside for the day? I was tempted, but closed the sliding door and made another foray to grab it. Success! However, as I approached the door, Lukas, still blowing his harmonica, swiftly slid it open leaving me to do a leg buckling side step to avoid tripping on the other cat as it darted underneath my feet.

I thought maybe I was being Punk'd. Eventually there came a point where I had retrieved both felines. It took several other minutes to gather everything else up: backpack, daycare bag, coffee, snack cup, his coat and hat. I then gingerly led Lukas down our front stairs, letting him play with some rocks in our courtyard as I hurriedly loaded the car.

"Uh, oh Daddy" was the next thing I heard, and I glanced behind the car where my son had wandered only to find his arm halfway up the tailpipe. Pulling out his greasy dirty arm, I then discovered a nearly perfect sized stone lodged inside the tailpipe. Benny would have been proud.

Eventually, I was able to find a small enough stick to dislodge said stone and we were on our way, leaving me a embarrassing 45 minutes late to work, exhausted, and with a renewed appreciation of just how much easier mornings go with my wife around to help us out the door.

Therefore, let me just say: "Honey, you rock. . . .and please don't schedule anymore early morning meetings!"

15 comments:

CK Lunchbox said...

Cue Benny Hill music... that could be the soundtrack for my life.

It would've been really crazy had your wife pulled into the drive only to see your son stuck still stuck in the tailpipe. Yikes.

dan said...

While I've never had a mornign quite so bad as yours, I find the whole "getting ready" routine extremely stressful. Four days out of five I'm doing it alone too as kerry goes in to work before the kids wake up.

SciFi Dad said...

I always find solo parenting more stressful too.

(And, not to stress you out or discourage you, but think about that morning while being outnumbered by people who poop in their pants.)

DCUrbanDad said...

It is definitely more stressful, but I do find that when my wife is around I tend to lean on her more. You know the more chiefs in the kitchen rule.

Mocha Dad said...

Try getting a little girl ready in the morning. You will break down crying as you attempt to comb and style her hair. My poor daughter has had to wear an afro more than she cares to remember.

Eric said...

hahaha
you are a great dad dude!
I dredd the day I have to drop our lil guy off at daycare...

Momo Fali said...

This cracked me up and made me feel so much better about my son stuffing grapes down the bathroom sink.

Lady Mama said...

I was totally hearing the Benny Hill music as I read your story. Too funny! And sounds exactly like every time my husband looks after our kids.

Xbox4NappyRash said...

Dunno about you, but I found that quite entertaining.

morethananelectrician said...

Alright...time for a lesson.

Leave when she leaves if possible...it might be awkward, but she then can help you get him to the car...and keep parts of his body out of dirty parts of the vehicle. Just drive around for 45 minutes. No stops though.

Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

I came over from Tales From The Dad Side... lol, I have to leave work an hour before my daughter has to go to pre-school so I can do her hair and get her ready...

My husband is amazing as a Father, but getting himself ready and then having to do his daughters hair? It's just easier if I hurry home for an hour and get it done.

The days I can't do that, her hair is thrown in a haphazard pony tail... but it's the cutest darn pony tail ever (according to my daughter--he walks on water to her).

But even as a Mom that does the morning thing all the time... I have more mornings where it us more like what you describe than not...

James (SeattleDad) said...

@CK - Yes, that would have been amusing. Wait...no it wouldn't have.

@Dan - And you have two. You must get a real early start.

@Scifi - Yes, two poopers would be worse than one. Glad my one usually leaves that for later.

@DC - I hear you. I tend to be a Brave more than a Cheif when Mrs. LIAYF is home.

@Mocha Dad - That would certainly add the the time involved and I can see why you let it go. Hopefully she won't hold it against you later. lol.

@Eric - Yeah, that was a dreadful day for me. What was worse was that I worked across the street and I went to visit that first day, and met them out on the sidewalk for a stroll. Lukas had cried so much he just looked right past me with tears in his eyes. I felt even worse.

@Momo - Ha! Glad to be of service.

@Lady Mama - Not sure why it still takes me by surprise, but it does.

@Xbox - Your turn is coming, friend. And you will love it.

@MTAE - Hmmm. I guess I could have killed an hour somewhere else. Not a bad idea....

@Shelle - Having a child think the world of you is the best thing. My times alone with my son can be adventurous, but always fun. Now, having to do a girls hair. I would butcher that if I had to attempt it. It would be a hat for her those days!

Captain Dumbass said...

I'm ten months into being a SAHD and I still don't know what the hell I'm doing. No job I've ever had has been this stressful.

WILLIAM said...

Cue the Benny Hill music...Classic.

Mrs. LIAYF said...

Thanks for the kudos, honey! I couldn't stop laughing when you told me about the tailpipe rock! You do a great job when I have to leave early for work. Lukas is happy and safe and I can go knowing he is in the best of hands.